A not-normal year, and what to put in your Christmas cards

I’ve started writing my Christmas cards and some of them normally have letters in them. And I’m wondering: what can you say about this not-normal year that we are almost (and glad to be) finished with? For most of the recipients, I don’t even know whether 2020 has been relatively kind to them, as it has to me, or whether they have been more closely touched by the pandemic.

Looking back on 2020, there are a lot of things that made me anxious, depressed and angry. (Very angry. A lot.) I’m not going to write about them. You know what they are. You probably felt (and feel) much the same as I do.

So I am going to focus on the reasons to be cheerful (and a few ways to give back). I know I’ve been lucky so far. If you haven’t, I hope this isn’t too hard to read. 

Learnt to slow down

I needed to learn this. My new year’s resolution for 2020 was “don’t take on more than three days’ client work a week”. Because when you work for yourself, you need time to do the business stuff and if you don’t leave space for it you end up doing overtime.

Some hope. By the time we got to lockdown I’d have said yes to any work, particularly after a big contract fell through.

But the shock of the first lockdown gave me brain fog and it hasn’t entirely gone away, so I don’t think I could now work at full capacity. And after decades of working too hard, maybe that’s a good thing.

After a while, it felt as if I was semi-retired, and I quite liked it. There’s more work coming in now, although not as much as normal, but I’m more aware now of work-life balance and what actually matters in life.

Spent more time with Husband

We both work from home under normal circumstances, but under normal circumstances he doesn’t come out of his office much. This year, he slowed down too. And when we spent time together, we were kinder than usual to each other and made the effort to make it Quality Time.

In reality, that meant spending a lot of time playing Upwords. It was my mum’s favourite game, and I regret now not practising more when she was alive. I never managed to beat her. I think now that I could, but it’s too late. (But that almost counts as a good thing too, because at least I don’t have to worry about her getting coronavirus.)

I know I’m lucky, part 1

Domestic abuse went up during lockdown. I think I need to campaign or donate.

Chose how to spend my time

Without my normal amount of paid work, I had time to do some interesting business-related things like a long-overdue website overhaul, and lots of training. Also, I finally finished writing my memoir.

I was fortunate that I was eligible for the government’s self-employed grant, so that took the pressure off once they finally got round to announcing it. (And in case Mr Sunak is watching, yes I have been looking for paid work as well.)

I also found some alternatives to going to church. I’d got a bit bored of going to church anyway (and I soon got bored of Zoom services) but, in a time where spiritual sustenance felt vital, I found lots of audio and video stuff to help keep me sane. (For non-religious friends, I recommend Radio Lento, and the Springwatch Mindful Moments.)

I know I’m lucky, part 2

Thousands of people have fallen through the cracks of the government’s Covid-19 aid packages. But they are fighting back, and they need help.

Got back to nature

You know about this one, because everyone talked about it. When the lockdown started, we did go out every day for exercise. And we discovered a duck pond, ten minutes’ walk from our house, that we hadn’t known about.

Also, the garden looked better this year than it has ever done, because I had time to do actual gardening. And we could sit in it through the long hot summer in peace and quiet. The usual traffic roar was silent. The sky, without contrails, was just blue. 

The exercising ever day thing didn’t last, obviously.

Got greener

All through the year, my Facebook feed was full of adverts telling me I needed to buy things. And I just went: why?

The ads went in waves. For a long time it was eco-friendly message T-shirts. But I’ve got enough eco-friendly T-shirts. They are eco-friendly because I’ve had them for 20 years. (Or more.)

I’ve always liked to think I was non-consumerist but this year I really was. I don’t think I’ve bought anything that wasn’t food. Or toilet paper. Or beer.

I know I’m lucky, part 3

I’m donating to my local food bank. There’s also the Red Cross or the Trussell Trust.

I still don’t know what to write in my Christmas cards, though.